I thought it was over but I'll be returning to school to complete our FYP. I agree with the lecturers that it would be a waste to leave the animation hanging as it has a lot of potential. I'll continue working on it until I get a job. That sounds like a decent arrangement for now.
Results are out and my paltry GPA has been computed, a reflection of bad decisions I made when faced with adversity. I pulled out way too late. I am however, forever thankful for the moral support of friends who helped me stay in the course of getting my diploma. I had never expected it to have been this hard to get that diploma. The most important thing now is to remember the lessons I've learned from all this. Sadly, I still forget at times.
I'd like to start working immediately but job hunting will be a new chapter of new challenges for me.
I'm available for freelance work. Flash animation, graphic design, poster designs, 3d modeling. Check out www.feer.co.cc. I cannot update the website since the server is down for upgrade but it is still worth checking the site out.
Man has a tendency to focus on what he is deprived from. Be it health or wealth. Partly its built-in to man's survival mechanism. When we injure ourselves, we will feel the pain. Pain is a signal for us to attend to the problem.
Pain, or challenges in life, becomes a problem when we mull over it extensively and starts to engage in self-pity. Being overly optimistic probably can't all that good either if we end up in wishful thinking. So I remind myself not to end up in the either one of the extreme states.
Having said that, my week had been interesting. I was not feeling well for most of the week... always a good opportunity to just let go and reflect.
On a higher note, March and April and the birthday months for everyone in our house except me. 30th March was Nadia's.
I had a conversation with my other siblings, those 21 and above. We were thinking of the presents we had given to our little sisters for the past years. We agreed that the presents we gave were things that we would have wanted when we were smaller.... and we are guilty of playing with the stuffs we gave to our little sisters(buang gian).
I personally find nothing wrong with that as we will be genuinely happy for them!! At the same time, we can teach the value of sharing :p
In the end its not the present that matters, what matters is the time we spend with one another. If a present helps in that process... so be it. As the older one, I see the challenges that my siblings would have to face. My job is to remind them when it's due. I see myself when I was her age in Nadia... and I'll do my best to guide her.
So young yet so stressed out. Kids shouldn't grow up like that. But some of us do... and it's mainly from self-expectation, not from external factors. We want to be perfect. We are the naturally driven types... but we need to have a purpose. For the kid, it could be trying to be the perfect student, trying to be the pride of the parents. It becomes hard when we fail to master the basics of self-expression. When we fall, we fall hard. We might even get our very psychological concept of 'Self' torn apart. When that happens, it's a tough process to recover without the proper intervention.
This blog namesake of an entry is just to state the situation that I am in right now. For eventually, others will find out. 'Biasa jer' itself is somewhat a denial of my current state. It's less of denying my current state but more of 'let's not make a big deal out of it'.
It's no surprise to find out that, not all is well in Firdaus Land if you were able to read in between the lines of my previous entries since last December. What am I talking about?
In the middle of last semester, I found myself unable to do my assignments due to an intense numbing pain on my right hand. Visits to doctors and an EMG later, I found out that the numbness originated from my spine. I was also told to do an MRI just to be sure.
For an animator/designer in training, the prospect seems scary and inspired entries such as this and this. Of course I have to continuously strive to be positive about it like the times such as this and this.
Apart from dealing with the pain, I had to think about my education and my future. I got myself deferred in last semester. I also managed to get an extension to my deferment this semester. Alhamdulillah. This will at least give me time to make a well thought out decision of my future.
Mentally stronger in dealing with the pain. Even the pain is not as bad. I'll have a week more before I get to hear what the doctor has to say. Physiotherapy session at NYP later today.
Such is my unorthodox existence and I shall carry on living it.
The decision to blog here wasn't the easiest decision. I am doing it anyway in hope that people will understand me better. Understand the difficulties that I go through. Understand the vision that I have.
This blog will contain mainly my dealings with Nypms. Trying to run it and trying to form Nypmsn. It will also contain some parts of my life if I deem it suitable.
Now, a little bit about myself. My name is Firdaus Bin Ab Latif. I am currently a third year NYP student taking Diploma in Digital Media Design. For those not in the know, I have already completed my national service.
Among the things that my life revolve around is my Sunday Pergas class. Year 3 in SPI. I am also taking a weekly Harfiyah class. That is a 'terjemahan' (translation) of the Al-Quran. Been doing that for more than 2 years now. I also tutor two primary 2 students. Three if counting my own sister.
