"The best lessons are learning things you already know." That's what SP4 feels like to me. Reaffirming and applying things that I already know. Learning new things too at the same time; from one another and from our lecturers. 

These TOS inflicted pair of hands in front of me are still able to play a role in a team. I can leave the the storyboard drawing and painting of the textures to those who can do it. Let me do what I can still do. Can't wait to see the finish product. 

Still too early for celebrations....but I already some ideas in mind to mark the end of this semester.  :)

I was feeling that the current set of exercises to relief my symptoms were not effective and had been trying some new exercises.... bad move. 

After my pergas class, which was awesome (new year, new people), I started to feel feverish and shivering. I have been constantly feeling on the verge of fever the last couple of weeks. So I ended up spending my late afternoon in bed feverish and shivering. 

That was the second time I shivered like crazy due to TOS. The first one was last year... that was even worse to a point that enough was enough.... I had to do an MRI.

I am feeling pretty alright now. I feel like something got washed out of my system with that bout of shivering. But still, I shall return to the old stretching exercises... maybe add new ones incrementally. Preferably with advise of a PT or an OT. 

Shivering like that also reminded me of Surah al-Muzzamil(orang yang berselimut). This was of course a reference to Rasulullah who was shivering in fear after the voice of angel Jibril. That tafsir class (i think 2-3 years ago) really touched me. Especially since I was just starting to get acquainted with NYPMS. There are many lessons we can learn from the surah.... I shall just name one. 

Its regarding the few people who wake up at night to pray and supplicate to Allah. Qiyamullail was made fardhu to Rasulullah and his companions for the first one year. This taught them discipline and resilience for the coming trials. We can learn from this in that we need to prepare ourselves and build up our resilience to challenges to come. I also learn that in this world, by Allah's will, there is a concept of cause and effect. Indeed if there isn't such a concept, man will be in a constant state of confusion not knowing what to make head of tails of things. If you want to achieve something, you will need to go through a certain process. Going through this process will require patience. And always remember that Allah is with those who are patient. Wallahu'alam.

I am at the point of my semester when Thoracic Outlet Syndrome snuck up on me last year. Emo episodes aside, it was quite a leap to finally decide to continue with the same course. One of the things that drove me on was the fact that I believed that I can train up my left end to be better and depend on it to get me through the course. I aimed to be as proficient with my left hand as my right by the end of last year.

I kept on training my left hand even though there were signs that my left arm were not spared from the symptoms my right arm is faced with. I denied the pain existed, refused to admit there is a problem. It finally caught up with me. My left hand is roughly about 60% as adept as my right..... probably having the proportionate amount of pain as well now. 

It feels like I'm going through the same thing last year all over again. I think I am better prepared this time round. This probably isn't as bad as it seems to me right now. I should not have lifted the benches and that severed buttress root at work. That is probably what's aggravating the pain that I'm having right now. I really need to understand my limits. That was last Saturday, the pain peaked last Monday. I'm taking this week cautiously. Gonna have to keep on with the stretching exercises as well.

The thought of finally finishing this semester always make me smile..... but there are still obstacles in the coming weeks. I don't mean to whine but I'm just not strong enough to keep everything in. I'm just letting a little bit out here. Pray for me that I'll get through the weeks ahead. Pray for Gaza as well.

It's not all bad though, in fact if I react appropriately, the whole experience should make me stronger. What doesn't kill you only makes you stronger.... cliche but true. But that.... you've got to experience yourself. A friend once told me that I need to make a decision a stick to it.... I'll try, for a lot is at stake.

At the very least, I can say that the whole experience managed to make me ambidextrous.... even if it means having to rest my arms for some time in between artworks. Shouldn't that make my art pieces more valuable?? 

Here's one I did totally with my left hand. Still can't don the fine line works with my left hand.... but I can rightfully claim to be ambidextrous can't I?